Turning The Page: Riverside libraries are schizo

Sounds like a great gig! ” Riverside libraries are schizo.”
Job opening: Interim director, Riverside library.
Job description: Oversees largely decrepit Main Library and new and/or remodeled branches (staffing optional).
Qualifications: Must be proficient at recruiting volunteers — including for your own position! Must enforce gag order forbidding library employees from speaking to media and customers about library policies. Must be able to reply, “Don’t hold your breath” when asked about downtown library expansion. Reports to city manager’s office. Must consent to frontal lobotomy.