Girls Gone Wild

The crowning event last night was the crank phone call I got on the info desk. The circ desk picked it up, and promptly put it down again.

"Ms. S--, there appear to be some kids calling for you on one..." my trusty sidekick said sweetly from the circ desk.

I picked up the phone and was met by giggles. Obviously, these kids were amateurs. I was an amateur. My cousin, however, could pull off any crank phone call with a straight face.

"I'm calling to see if my movie is in. It's a porno."

So, the little creeps weren't terribly creative, either.

I decided to play along. I probably shouldn't have. "What's the title?"

There was a mortified pause. Then more giggles and a triumphant, "GIRLS GONE WILD!"

Reality: I told them to have a nice evening and hung up.

Fantasy: I could have handled this several ways. Scenario One goes like this:

Me: Girls Gone Wild? That's not really the porno genre. If you're looking for a true porno, I suggest something like Amateurs #127 or, if you're into classics Debbie Does Dallas. I see though, since you're really into library type settings and are obviously good patrons, and library supporters, that you might like something a little more themed, like Midnight Librarians.

Them: Um. [Click].

Scenario Two:

Me:Sorry, I can't seem to find Girls Gone Wild. Perhaps the title is slightly different than what you're remembering? Is it perhaps a series title? Let me search OCLC for the MARC record... No, nothing. Do you know the author? I could scan the 245 field for you? Oh, here it is... Mantra Film's Girls Gone Wild. For the record, there's several titles under this series name. Is there a particular one you're looking for? No? Do you have internet access at home? You can check the catalog from there for a suitable title... To make your search easier, the Library of Congress subject heading for this is Women -- Feral.

Them:[All I hear on the line is the dripping of drool (and possibly snoring) and then... click.]

Catalogers: Please forgive any mangling I did of your profession in my fantasy scenario. I still maintain I have the utmost respect for catalogers and all you do, since I am so confused by anything other than the 245 field. So what would the LC subject heading for Girls Gone Wild be?

Comments

... and I wish I could use it to mod this journal entry "+1 Funny". Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be possible to moderate journal entries.

This former cataloger enjoyed your imaginings and forgives you freely and fully for any conceivable slights against the profession in this entry.

Someone's got way too much time on their hands to be able to come up with all of those alternate endings ;)

Fridays off stink... my husband is at work and there's no one to play with! :)

you: "Fridays off stink"

me: falls off chair, unable to process such a statement

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