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Beefy Library Security

Another Ryan writes \"We would all do well to take a leaf from the book of the Cedar Rapids Public Library.

Full, uh, story from The Onion\"

New security will include, requiring a birth certificate and two forms of photo ID for a library card. The daily children\'s story hour has been shortened to 20 minutes. And while the library has always officially had a no-loitering rule on the books, it will now be strictly enforced, they are, after all, the most prominent public building in the second largest city in Iowa

Please note the source on this one before you take it seriously.

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Harry Potter not blamed for September 11 yet

Terrorism experts today confirmed that the popular Harry Potter fantasy novels by J.K. Rowling are not currently under suspicion for causing the tragic events of September 11. The novels, in which a boy discovers that he is a talented wizard, have not yet been accused of hijacking jumbo jets or piloting them into office buildings.

The books\' complicity in everything else that\'s wrong with the world, however, remains to be seen.

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That\'s Why I Go the Public Library, Where I Can Look Up Anything

Groan...After a brief vacation, which evaporated all too quickly, I\'ve found myself back at my desk under a mountain of e-mail which I suspect I\'ll have finished answering sometime after the next ice age. I did receive a link to the following story, however, which I have decided to share. David Grebe has written a column for the Ames (IA) Tribune entitled \"Worldwide Puritanism.\" He talks about employers cracking down on \"inappropriate use of the Internet,\" and how one little typo, such as inputting \".com\" rather than \".org,\" and haven\'t we all done it, may have resulted in a meeting of the minds at his workplace over the issue. Obviously, when Internet activity logs are maintained, such a \"boo-boo\" can result in a somewhat embarrassing incident, which, of course depends upon one\'s sense of humor. more...

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\'Onion\' editor talks about new book

CNN has a nifty Little Interview with Onion editor Robert Siegel, they have a new book out -- \"Dispatches from the Tenth Circle.\".
The interview is short, but funny.

Siegel: Are your stories real?
CNN: Absolutely. We are the world\'s news leader.
Siegel: OK, then we\'re on the same page here.

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God\' monkey sits through lecture before studying

Charles Davis writes \"A monkey sat quietly through an economics lecture at an
Indian college before going to the library and flipping
through a holy book.
Students at Madanpur Mahabir College in Bhubaneswar,
Orissa, say the monkey listened to the lecture with \"rapt
attention\".
The monkey then went to the library and looked at the
Ramayana, a Hindu holy book, and sat on a statue of the
monkey god Hanuman before quietly leaving the college.

Full Story \"

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Would you like sour cream on that?

One of the sites I regularly check in my current hunt for employment is HotJobs. I\'ve noticed that when I search for "library" in the Illinois listings, a lot of the hits are ads for assistant managers at Taco Bell and KFC. Probably pay better than a lot of public library jobs ...

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The Overdue Librarian Cops Cartoon

Something to liven up your afternoon - a short and funny parody of \"Cops\" from The Cartoon Network featuring a librarian on patrol to bust folks with overdue books!

Scroll to the bottom and click on the link labeled \"Overdue.\" Flash software is required to view the cartoons.

Here\'s The Latest Link.

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Book smarts vs. street smarts in The Onion

From this week\'s edition of The Onion:

Street-Smart Teen Dies In Library
CHICAGO-- Street-smart teen Larry Witherspoon was found dead Monday at the Michigan Avenue branch of the Chicago Public Library, his urban know-how useless to him in the unfamiliar environment...

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Fun With Phonics

Remember back when it was funny to look up the word
fart in the dictionary?Well imagine how much
funnier that would\'ve been if the dictionay talked!
Bob Cox sent along This Funny Bit from over at Plastic.

Imagine all the fun you could\'ve had! Why you could\'ve
had it say penis, vagina, or Worse! All this fun from Merriam-Webst
er\'s on-line dictionary
.

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Biblia, the Warrior Librarian

Amanda Credaro writes
\"This may possibly be the only website in existance
devoted to *school library* humor.
www.geocities.com/bibliophist/

(There\'s also a smattering of serious stuff too)
\"

\"People under the age of 18 years should be
warned:
This school librarian will not tolerate abuse of
books,
bullying, resistance to learning, or unnecessary
noise.
Enter the library at your own risk, and prepare for
battle.
You WILL study, you WILL read, you WILL enjoy
it.\"

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