Expert Goulash with a Donut on the Side


David Plotnikoff, staff writer for the San Jose Mercury News, notices that \"on the Net there is no shortage of structures to facilitate the orderly transfer of advice from the clued to the clueless. ... Every recreational pursuit from water ballet to weasel husbandry seems to command at least one Web site that\'s well-populated with professional experts and eager kibitzers of all stripes.\"

I am somewhat jealous of the fact that this columnist\'s mockery of the expert advice field was funnier than my own effort three weeks earlier in a column called Expert Soup. I began that column with a reference to Ann Landers and ended it with a reference to donuts, finally quipping:

Come to think of it, maybe I\'ll hire myself out as an expert devoted to answering the question \"Do you have Dr. Ballard in a can?\" Nope, but I have your $1.50. Cha-ching, smart aleck.

Plotnikoff offers a proposal for a site called, offering NON-EXPERT ADVICE in a variety of categories such as home maintenance: Can you safely run celery or chicken skin through the garbage disposal? You bet. Just set the disposal to run at a higher RPM. As I said, too funny.

Completely off topic: Plotnikoff isn\'t the only one who has been thinking on the same wavelength as me lately. A week after I posted my Expert Soup column, I was skimming a favorite online magazine about fitness. I don\'t remember what the lead editorial was about, exactly, but I do know that the editor\'s humorous column began with a reference to Ann Landers, and ended with a reference to donuts. I\'m not making this up!

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