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The Internet is down.
I'm sorry. The Internet is down.
Due to the power outage downtown, we don't have Internet access.
As it says on the sign, the Internet is down.
The Internet is still down.
The computers are up, and Internet is available, but spotty, and the catalog is still down.
"Oh, I don't need that. I just need my e-mail."
You've never heard of a RefGrunt?