Book smarts vs. street smarts in The Onion

From this week\’s edition of The Onion:

Street-Smart Teen Dies In Library
CHICAGO– Street-smart teen Larry Witherspoon was found dead Monday at the Michigan Avenue branch of the Chicago Public Library, his urban know-how useless to him in the unfamiliar environment…

From this week\’s edition of The Onion:

Street-Smart Teen Dies In Library
CHICAGO– Street-smart teen Larry Witherspoon was found dead Monday at the Michigan Avenue branch of the Chicago Public Library, his urban know-how useless to him in the unfamiliar environment…
\”Unfortunately, the skills Larry had developed on the mean streets of Chicago\’s South Side did him no good in a place like this,\” librarian Mary Ross said. \”Hypothetically, he could have located a book on library survival skills, had he known what the Dewey Decimal system was and how to use it.\”