I took a stand for intellectual freedom and for it I lost my job. After everything I am still wondering: why do I keep pushing ahead? Why do I keep trying to stay in a profession that within the United States is a house divided? After having taken almost five weeks to recover I just am still at a loss.
I see references to "stands for intellectual freedom" and promoting intellectual diversity. Are those merely pious niceties that never require one to get their hands dirty? Are those the highest ideals of our profession? What can one do when a supervisor is in a position where he can rubbish the Code of Ethics and the Library Bill of Rights? Does one merely point out the fault and move on or does one try to make a difference?
I guess that comes to the root of the problem. I do not deal in pious niceties. Action was taken that resulted in the loss of my job. Such was not a bad thing, though. Massive problems were pointed out to administrators. The potential further damage is being hopefully limited drastically so that that person who otherwise should know better cannot harm the integrity of any other library.
Passing resolutions is one matter. That lets an organization speak in its collective voice. Taking action is different and is something I can barely find in the profession. When faced with something wrong, unethical, or immoral what do we do? Do we just ignore it and move along? Do we tolerate evil things through such ignorance? Or do we try to uphold standards and ideals even though there may be a cost in doing so?
Without ideals and ethics, is librarianship even a profession? If such is treated merely as pious niceties do they actually have any real meaning? Or can such be disregarded as being just words written on scraps of paper?
I am just at a loss. I truly am. Do I try to continue in librarianship? Do I give up and try for a different direction in my life? Being an old millenial/young gen-Xer (such depends upon whose year cutoffs you look at) means that I have possibly quite a number of years ahead of me. Some family already mention that even though I have aptitude for the profession it seems to them like my heart just is not in it any more.
(If any of the editors want to contact me privately via e-mail you might have my address on file. There is more of a story to tell, unfortunately.)